Kids' Sayings

Below is a collection of things our older kids said when they were younger. Their approximate ages at the time are in parentheses.
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Amanda (4): “Can we have gorilla cheese sandwiches?”
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Amanda (3): “Daddy, can you come play with me?”
Daddy: “I can’t right now, because I have a headache.”
(ten minutes later)
Amanda: “Daddy, are you done with your headache yet?”
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Daniel (4), explaining the physics of lightning: “The sky had a crack in it!”
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Daniel (4), describing the family drug policy “We don’t eat pills . . . but just apple pills.”
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Rusty (talking to a boy): “What’s your name, little boy?”
Daniel (4): “His mommy calls him Jonathan, so that’s probably his name.”
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Rusty: “Whose hair is this?” (holding up an 8-inch strand)
Daniel (4): “Daddy, it’s yours.”
Rusty: “My hair isn’t that long. See?”
Daniel: “But it was inside your head.”
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Daddy: “The air is cooler over at Aunt Renee’s, because they live next to the ocean.”
Daniel (4): “Yeah. But we live where the sun is.”
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Daddy: “Someday, you’ll be as tall as me, when you’re a grown-up.”
Daniel (4): “And I can eat some food whenever I want, huh?”
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Daniel (4) (to Daddy): “Draw our family. And draw the computer too, ‘cause it’s in our family.”
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Daddy (reading a Bible story): “And they preached to the robbers, and those who repented were set free, but those who did not repent were condemned and punished according to the law.”
Amanda (6): “And I’ll bet they were fired, too.”
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Amanda (6) had lost her third tooth recently, and we were at the dinner table. Uncle Ray asked her, “What are you going to eat with, Amanda?” and she promptly held up her fork.
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Kelvin (2) (holding up some glue stick): “Daddy, what’s this?”
Daddy: “That’s glue.”
Kelvin: “Goo? To paint your mouth?”
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Uncle Ray was wrestling around with Kelvin, and had him pinned on the floor—
Ray: “Who’s bigger?”
Kelvin (2): “Daddy.”
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Daniel (4): “Daddy, now when you have a birthday, you have big friends instead of little friends.”
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When told it was bedtime, Kelvin (2) got up on the kitchen table where he could reach the clock and pointed to one of the hands, and declared, “Two minutes to go to bed.”
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Daddy: “Do you want me to read a story about Jesus?”
Kelvin (2): “No, I want to read story ‘bout catapillas.”
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Amanda (7): "Daddy, how do you spell 'Corvette'?"
Rusty: "C-O-R-V-E-T-T-E."
Amanda: "Hmm... Mrs. Ira spelled it right."
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Kelvin (2): "The wind is blowing, so I'm gonna blow it back. Like this, with my lips."
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Amanda (7), using a calculator: "Daddy, how do I do a backspace?"
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When Audrey and I were leaving the kids with a babysitter so we could go to the Portland Temple . . .
Kelvin (2): "Are you and Mommy gonna get married?"
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Kelvin (2): "When the sun comes in my eyes, I hold up my jacket in front."
Rusty: "You hold it up in front of your face?"
Kelvin: "No, in front of the sun."
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Rusty: "To throw the paper airplane, you hold it right here."
Kelvin (2): (giving it a try) "But you let go..."
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Rusty: "How come ants and flies can walk on the wall?"
Amanda (7): "Because they don't weigh as much as we do."
Rusty: "But if you dropped them, they would still fall."
Amanda: "Flies wouldn't fall."
Daniel (5): "If you smack 'em, then they fall."
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Kelvin (2): "Your bones are inside of you so you can stand up. If you didn't, then you'd get squishy."
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The kids were doing computer puzzles . . .
Rusty: "Don't help Kelvin."
Daniel (5): "I'll just give him a hint."
Kelvin (2): "No, I'll give myself a hint."
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Rusty and Kelvin got in the car and were about to drive off.
Rusty: "Is everybody ready?"
Kelvin (4): "It's not everybody — it's just one buddy."
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Kelvin (4): "Zach's mom has a waterbed. If you take off the sheets you can see the water. The pillows don't sink, though, so it's just pretend water"
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Daniel (6) (explaining to Kelvin that he could be a football referee for Halloween): "You can be the one who blows a whistle if someone falls over."
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Daddy: "Daniel, I'm fixing your dinner."
Daniel (6): (smiling) "Why, does it have anything wrong with it?"
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Kelvin (4): "Rolly-pollies can roll up like a ball, and take turns using themselves as a basketball."
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Rusty told the kids about one time on his birthday when he was young, he went to the swimming pool, and got stung two times. Daniel (6) then said without hesitation, "I bet you didn't have a happy b-day."
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Daniel (6): "Here's the bee Mommy trapped in the window. It's not hurt or anything, but it's still dead."